The Holidays Remind Us Why Family Comes First
Do you love the holidays as I do? Or do you feel more like Scrooge (like my husband pretends to be)? If you’re not in the “Bah humbug” mood, what is it that brings you joy about this season? Lights, music, food, festivities, gifts, baking, gatherings, decorations, smells, traveling, the weather, church or school activities, wrapping, shopping, Christmas cards, more family and/or friend time?
Regardless of our beliefs, family situations, or preferences, holidays tend to bring family to the forefront of our minds. Maybe it’s time we finally decide to leave your family comfort not confusion by preparing in advance, rather than putting off important conversations.
Comfort or Confusion? The Legacy We Leave Our Family
What do I mean by that? No matter what our age, there’s a way to take care of our family even after we are gone. The holidays and life in general tend to blur together, faster and faster. Suddenly, we, and those around us, are aging and we begin losing loved ones. The next thing you know, I am meeting regularly with widower and widow clients as they move forward after losing a spouse.
Avoiding Financial Planning Creates Confusion
When I started helping families with their financial lives over 20 years ago, a common lament by clients (related to IRA distributions) was “how did I get to be 70 ½ already!?!” Aging is part of life, a part that we don’t usually like to think about since it means there will also be an end. And maybe even some incapacity along the way to the end of life. More unpleasant thoughts.
Why 2026 Can Be the Year You Leave Your Family Comfort Not Confusion
But ignoring and doing nothing to prepare for those times, will not make the reality of aging go away. Maybe during this season of giving and spending time with family, we proactively decide to get financially organized in the new year as our best, last gift to our family…whenever that may be. Tell yourself that 2026 is going to be the year you take the bull by the horns and do it.
Getting Your Financial House in Order for Your Family
So what does it mean to get your financial house in order, to benefit you now and your family later? At a minimum, you need to answer three important questions:
- What do I have (assets)?
- Have I told those assets where to go?
- Are my wishes in writing?
What Do I Have? Understanding Your Full Financial Picture
Let’s tackle each one briefly. The document that answers the first question is technically called a Net Worth statement. I designed a fill-in-the-blank summary that is user-friendly (a fillable PDF in understandable categories) that shows you immediately what you have and where it is, along with the important details that most personal financial statements like this leave out (i.e. the account title and beneficiary). It will become the Master List of what there is to help you if you are incapacitated AND what there is to be distributed by your executor or Successor Trustee after you are gone.
Telling Your Assets Where to Go
I wrote a separate blog on “telling your assets where to go.” In a nutshell, it’s all about titling your accounts correctly and also adding appropriate beneficiary designations. Did you know you can name a beneficiary on your non-IRA accounts at the bank, your home, and your non-IRA investment accounts?
Putting Your Wishes in Writing
Lastly, what wishes in writing am I talking about? Who do I want to talk to my doctor to make medical decisions (health care power of attorney)? Who do I authorize to act for me at the bank or on my financial matters (Durable power of attorney aka financial POA)? How do I want my remains handled, cremation or burial (final disposition document)? Who gets my accounts and other titled assets (will, trust, beneficiary designations and account titles)? Who gets my stuff aka non-titled personal items (personal property disposition list, you can handwrite, sign and date this without an attorney)?
A Holiday Commitment to Leave Your Family Comfort Not Confusion
The tools that I share in my monthly newsletter can help tremendously with financial organization. Let the holidays remind you how much you value family and friends. Enough to commit to taking action in the new year. Let’s end this year with the mindset that 2026 will be the year of loving our families even after we are gone by preparing in advance to leave them in comfort, not confusion!
Have you experienced comfort or confusion regarding someone’s wishes after they passed? What would have helped you in those situations? Or what have you done to prevent confusion if you are incapacitated or after you are gone? Let’s share our stories to help each other!